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These pages were last updated: November 23, 1997
ŠNovember 1997
The following is a bit of alternative fiction based on certain characters from the Xenaverse. It is not meant to infringe on anyone else's rights. If you don't agree or disapprove, please go read something else.
SQUICK alert: This Tartarus for Hell's sake! Expect grodities.
Xex Alert: Yep there will be. Sizzling Hot, but later.
Amazingly, the portal opened up to reveal. . .another portal. There were four guards. Two guards were watching the portal to Hades Judgment court and two watching the portal to Tartarus. Izzy stopped in the middle of the grey stone room and waited for the rest of the adventurers to file in. Tok clicked to the center and sat on its haunches. The participants of the crazy experiment staggered in. There was always a little disorientation at first, but you got used to it. It was a bit like sailing that way.
"How Goes Izzy?" rumbled one of the guards on the Tartarus side. The muscular red giant cracked a wide smile, revealing row upon row of white pointed teeth. He held a wide sword, bigger than a human being, across his broad chest. His broad sandled feet covered an several paces of ground.
Izzy smirked and shook her head, "Hades wants me to play tour guide. These folks get to come back through when they're done." She watched as they gathered in on themselves, with Salmoneus somehow placed in the middle. No one had drawn a sword yet.
That was good. It demonstrated bravery and common sense. They might make it after all.
A rather large jawbone dropped and clattered to the ground. The third guard picked it up with a clawed hand, dusted the bone off and started chewing on the bits with meat again. "Sorry," he muttered apologetically. Then he explained, casually, "They drew and quartered that giant this morning like they always do. Glovyn, was it. Finally got me a share this time." The belch he uttered next was loud and foul. He patted his chest. "Pardon me."
The Elysians looked queasy, especially the ones who had been here before. It was easy to forget this part. One wanted to.
Izzy shook her finger at the demon, "You're gonna feel that on the way out you know." Her expression spoke of caution, moderation. Salmoneus gaped at her, finally cluing into what they were talking about. She ignored the humans, or pretended to. It was best they learned this now.
Marcus and Xena looked at each other, both having sudden vivid memories of the "meals" that were offered while they were in residence. At that moment there was a deeply silent, intuitive and powerful communication between them and both looked with relief at each other. Neither had eaten. Both vowed silently. They were checking the packs to see what kinds of rations and how much Hades provided them with as soon as they could.
The guard looked sheepish, "I know, but they taste so good." He wiped a greasy hand against a blood colored vest. It hid the stain.
Izzy snorted, "Railfish taste as good, there's plenty of it, and it's better for your digestive track. You're gonna be moaning and groaning with the rest of those who eat souls, all night long." She pointed at the tourists, "These folks are gonna eat better and do better than you will tonight." Marcus and Xena looked at each other. There were alternatives?
The fourth guard, the one guarding the portal to the Judgment seat laughed. The guffaw shook the whole room hard enough that portions of the wall came down and bounced around, some dangerously close to the Elysians. He waved his hand out, and a wind blew through the room, pushing the humans towards the Tartarus portal, "Oh Izzy, Ya Kill me!" Izzy squinted and shook her head.
Oh well. She always tried to convince the humanitarians. It was useless as usual. You had to catch them before they got started or just after they'd finished moaning and groaning. Not that they could all quit cold. The withdrawal was hell.
The other guard who was watching the Judgment portal grimaced down at the humans. Enough chatter. He had a job to do. "Name yourselves." His official sounding voice echoed through a now quiet room.
There was a bit of silence and Izzy said, "Do It! He's gotta know who you are so he can let you back in. That is, if you stay in one piece." She grinned evilly and shoved the tall dark woman forward, "Go on." Xena looked back and glared at Izzy, but the Tartarus' native glared in return. Xena had to turn first. She had priorities. Take care of business first, find Gabrielle, vengeance later. The warrior introduced herself, as did her compatriots.
Meanwhile, Tok, who'd been prowling around the spot where the bone had fallen came back, finishing the process of swallowing. Izzy's eyebrows raised! "TOK!" She grimaced at the daggite with a menacing glare. The creature looked back at her with wide innocent eyes and she sighed. "Come 'ere." It padded over to her and she felt along its belly, sighed, then patted it roughly on the head, "We'll see how you are when the dark falls, eh?" It purred against her knees in conciliation, oblivious to the pain it would later experience. Nothing like a Tartarus short memory. The demoness sighed again and shook her head. Izzy looked up to see Melosa watching her, cocked an eyebrow, and gave a snarled grin. The Amazon turned away, but not before giving her an unreadable look.
When everyone was through identifying themselves, they stepped through the final portal.
The entry way wasn't much to look at. They were in a circular room made of humid black stone. There were three doors, two of which were open. There was no door behind them, where the portal had been. A vague light could be seen under the closed door. There was a green skinned creature sitting on a high stool, in front of a podium. "Names please." He said querulously. He was an aged being and long white hair drifted well past his knees, not that his body was very long to begin with and he had a bald spot on the top.
"They're not to be residents Dawim. They're tourist." Izzy's voice sent strokes of pleasure through the humans. If you closed your eyes, thought Perdicus as he shivered, you forgot she had pointy teeth.
The small humanoid huffed and jumped off the chair, his white hair floating behind him. "Tourists!" He waddled towards them and as he did, pulled an object off of his brow and let it fall upon his nose. He peered through clear crystal at the first individual he encountered. Perdicus very cautiously didn't move as the creature scanned and sniffed at him. A second point for the adventurers. "Be Damned," the green one said.
Izzy grinned, "That you are," she agreed in a friendly tone.
"Hmmph." He squinted up at Izzy and nodded towards the humans. "They gonna be here long?"
"As long as their tokens allow. Hades'll send a memo. They're here to help with the population control."
"Damn well better." The little demon commented. He waved a ratty quill. It had seen better days. "Gotta keep track of them all you know. Now I'll have to start a second book." He sniffed as he waddled back to his stool, "For tourists."
Izzy turned to the humans, "Got anyone you'd be interested in seeing down here? He's the one to ask. He's got all the names and their room numbers listed down." She folded her arms, rested her weight on one foot and waited. Might as well get this over with. No human ever wanted to come to Tartarus unless they were looking for someone. She'd known that as soon as she saw them.
The adventurers looked at each other. It couldn't be that easy could it? Marcus nodded at Xena and held Salmoneus back. The merchant looked up at the warrior and sighed. He'd check on his contact later.
Xena, with a hopeful expression on her face, strode forward. She looked intensely at Dawim and spoke softly. "We're looking for Gabrielle. Gabrielle of Potedia. She was Queen of the Amazons. Died a couple of years ago from falling off a cliff." She tapped at the book expectantly and looked into the green man's redslitted eyes.
The little man looked at Izzy, briefly. The demoness gave a short nod. He began searching the aged tome.
That was more for demonstration purposes. He knew where everyone was in his head, didn't even need the book. In fact, the scrawl was illegible, but it made things look efficient. He picked a page at random.
"Let's see. Lots of Gabrielle's here. Potedia did you say?"
Xena nodded and the Amazons made their way to the podium too. Marcus and Perdicus hung back. The podium was getting too crowded. Instead they tried to stare unobtrusively at Izzy. They weren't that good at at the unobtrusive part, but Izzy ignored them. She had better things to do. Tok snuggled up against her and she smiled down at the daggite and lightly played with its horns. The purr was as light as her touch, almost inaudible, but she felt the rumble against her leg. Good Tok. Good Girl.
Melosa looked curiously at the book and tried to decipher the lettering. She got her hand smacked by scaled fingers when she started tracing a line through the garbled lettering. She withdrew her hand, but not her interest. She looked back at Izzy, ignored the tingle in her belly that she seemed to always feel whenever she looked at the demoness, and caught sight of a surprisingly tender expression directed at the daggite. The demoness looked up again, caught her staring, and hardened her face. Melosa put her attention back on the book. She would talk to Oriena later.
The demon continued, his own gnarled hand trailing down the length of the book. "Potedia. .potedia. .ah .. here it is. .lets see. .the Hall of Self Inflicted Evils, room 2,367,924. Take the door to the left. Go down the Hall of Deadly Sins, make another left at the Den of Iniquities, and then take a right. That should get you to the Hall of SIE's."
Funny how fast a backpack can get returned to your shoulders, Salmoneus thought, as he was hustled out the door. He was already making notes. "Maps."
Xenite Temple | Fan Fiction Site | Home Page
These pages were last updated: November 23, 1997
ŠNovember 1997