FINAL DRAFT: 040100
Disclaimers: Uber SAME SEX angst and LOVING AHEAD.
Despite the quiet of the cabin, the soothing sounds of the waves, and the hypnotic rhythm of the night's rowing drums, the storyteller was unable to return to her earlier slumber. Her mind was filled with questions that nagged at the soul. Gabrielle's head was filled with worries for her lover and herself and her body ached with painful tensions.
Upset of any kind seemed to make her legs feel worse at any time, but this night felt especially bad. The shattering of her limbs had left her more than familiar with needling pangs that came with changes in the climate. But the timing of her pains could seem so random sometimes. On this night, the ache of her emotions and her legs made it impossible for her to sleep.
Gabrielle would not deign to take a drug, in case Xena returned. It was her hope, perhaps, that if she bided her time, the warrior would be able to finally trust her enough. The storyteller knew that she needed to know what was torturing the Conqueror's soul.
The young woman could imagine what it was, had imagined with fearsome dreams of her own. She had heard many stories of her lover, had seen with her own eyes the cruelty the woman could inflict, had felt it. Absently she rubbed a hand against her shins, breathing deep to quell the hurt. Gabrielle knew that it had taken a long time to win the woman's love, though that had been an *unexpected* result of her effort. She also knew that she shouldn't rush Xena.
She just wanted to know, to reassure, to be able, somehow to take the the warrior's pain away. If only for a little bit.
Being around Xena eased her own burden, most times. She wished to return the favor. Her heart told her Xena, deep in her dark depth, was worth it. She had always been worth it.
Xena just didn't know it.
After a few moments, Gabrielle determined that she might as well put the time to use. The strawberry blonde wrested herself from under the warm comfort of the covers, and reached for her long staff.
She stood up with determination, allowing herself a small shuddering groan since Xena was not present. Even though she no longer had to worry about their deadly bargain, Gabrielle still opted to show strength for Xena. It helped.
If she acted strong, she often felt strong. Besides, if Xena had known of the bard's pain, she wouldn't have left. And while Gabrielle might have preferred the conqueror to stay, it wasn't because she was hurting. She wanted Xena to stay because it was her wish to, not because of fear or obligation.
Such reasons could be tiresome. Xena was very solicitous of Gabrielle, ever watchful that the bard shouldn't try too hard or wear herself out.
Sometimes the Conqueror would even get a little overbearing about it, forbidding her to do this or that. It seemed as if she'd forgotten that the bard had led a life of independence long before she'd known the Warrior Queen. Even after Gabrielle's legs had been shattered and reset, it had been her own efforts that carried her into Xena's castle. But Gabrielle accepted that these attentions were acts of love on the Empress' part and strove not to let herself feel suffocated by them.
If it got too bad, the strawberry blonde vowed to herself, she would just tell Xena. Surely the warrior would understand. Xena was quite the independent herself.
Gabrielle waited a breath or two to get her full balance, then stoically made her way to the small walnut desk on the other side of the cabin. She unshuttered the lamp. Its yellow bright flame grew higher along the wick.
The lamp, she thought with appreciation, was a very clever invention. Much safer than the torches. It was much less likely to burn down a whole city or the Queen's ship.
Gabrielle cautiously closed the lamp's glass covering. She was well aware that its relative safety did not mean she shouldn't be careful. She was careful about many things in Xena's company. Even the good stuff. She smiled to herself at the side benefits of knowing Xena, then settled into writing.
Gabrielle noted in her journal that the actual journey to Chin was not taking as long as she expected. Though Xena had plans to make the journey shorter. Her people were working on a long canal to cut a passage between Asia and Africa. That was an accomplishment that would be completed many years off. At this time, however, they would sail the Black Sea and dock at a port nearer Chin. Then their travels would take place overland.
Gabrielle hoped to see many new things on their journey. Already her scrolls were filling with notations and details about her experience upon the ship. She found that travel excited her. It filled something deep within.
Were it not for the ship's drifting and surging motions that kept the bard seasick, Gabrielle might have enjoyed it more. She hoped Xena was right; that those nauseous feelings were simply the result of her newness to ship born travel.
Gabrielle noted that the sea was very much, to Xena's joy, a wild, wondrous, untamable thing. It was, perhaps, the only place that Xena had no wish to conquer. The isles might be hers, but she ceded the sea to Poseidon.
Gabrielle found that she desperately wanted to share Xena's joy and yearned for "sea legs." She hoped that those limbs were much better than the pair that she walked on now.
Despite her motion sickness, Gabrielle couldn't truly fault the ride. Xena's clever refinements to Roman invention had made for a swift and sturdy ship. It combined the sailor's and the oarsman's skill into something that practically flew across the sea.
The small ship was opulent and comfortable on the inside. Outside there was nothing to distinguish it from others of its type. This was a precautionary measure taken by Xena. Though the ship flew the bright maroon and gold standard, the sea's salt had dulled the colors to something less vivid and attracting to marauders.
There were a few of those pirates claiming the sea. They hid on far off isles and the islanders whispered of unconquered lands. So it was wise to be wary in this world, even though Xena's navies were the strongest known. If Xena was cautious of the pirates, they were even more so. Her ships' prows had an image of the Conqueror butting dangerously forward. Another ship would suffer from the contact, should it risk battle.
Gabrielle thought that was much like her lover.
The intelligent blonde winced as she shifted in her chair, but she mostly ignored the pain. There had been worse times than this. Gabrielle's legs had, on occasion, thrummed with the pounding of the drums when high adventure overtook them.
There had been three instances when the drums had pounded battle's beat, pushing the oarsmen to their limits. Such moments stirred the blood with both fear and anticipation. With Xena on board, they never retreated.
With a sigh, Gabrielle dipped her pen in ink and painted another word on the parchment, letting her thoughts take her far away for the moment. She was writing a small tale about about a mix up. In her mind's eye she saw Xena with sisters who looked incredibly like...Xena. She laughed to herself as she penned a bawdy named Meg to josh her lover with. Gabrielle loved to hear Xena laugh; it was so rare, and she knew, if she played this right...
Her pen skittered out of her hand, she was startled so badly by the first shout. Her palm smeared the ink on the page, erasing the name of the fool she was crafting for the story. She let the pen go, turning in her chair to listen more carefully. She heard muffled shouts of, "Pirates HO!"
Then she shivered as a vision overtook her.
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